He Wants It All...

I am trying to make sure I spend time with God everyday and not just on Sunday - usually in the morning before the craziness of the school day. There are certain songs that I can hear and it immediately sets the tone/environment for some good QT with God. I keep hearing this song on the radio "He Wants It All" that I absolutely love and I did a little research. It's about God walking through the world and calling His children to serve Him. All He wants is for us to let go of our personal motives and give Him our all... It hits close to home because I spent a lot of time this summer figuring out how to use my life as a sacrifice for God. You spend all this time stressing about what that means for you to give your all to God and what you may have to give up, but when you finally let go of doing things your way, the blessings begin to pour out and you realize that you didn't "lose" anything. In fact, it was the best decision you could have made.

The group is called Forever Jones and their story/testimony is amazing. Can't wait for their CD to come out :-D

There's a voice that cries out in the silence,
searching for heart that will love him,
longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all, he wants it all

And there's a God that walks over the earth,
he's searching for heart that is desperate,
And longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all, he wants it all

And he says, love me, love me with your whole heart
he wants it all today
serve me, serve me with your life now
he wants it all today
bow down, let go of your idols
he wants it all today (x3)
He wants it all

There's a God that walks over the earth,
he's searching for heart that is desperate,
longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all, he wants it all

And he says, love me, love me with your whole heart
he wants it all today
serve me, serve me with you life now
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
he wants it all today
bow down, let go of your idols
he wants it all today (x3)
He wants it

Oh oh oh, all of you, more of you
wants it all today oh oh oh
Today, today

he wants it all today, he wants is all today
so give it all

There's a voice that cries out in the silence,
searching for heart that will love him,
longing for child that will give him their all,
give it all

He wants it all...

One Week Down....

I now have my first week of medical school under my belt, and so far so good :-) They did a good job of easing us into everything...one of the highlights of the week was definitely our day in the simulation center - I learned how to do sutures, use an otoscope (we got to see a normal ear and an ear infection ear), ophthalmoscope, listen to heart sounds, and put a chest tube in a test dummy...I was so proud of myself!

Last night, the hubs and I went on our first date since Valentine's day and it was a lot of fun :-D Today we were reunited with the little one and when he saw us he let out a HUGE scream. It was the cutest ever. I missed him so much and I am so happy to have him back....

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For homework, we had to write a reflective essay on our first week of gross anatomy, and I think it sums up my most memorable experience this week and probably the semester:

Having the little organ donor heart on my driver’s license always made me feel like that was my way of leaving this earth and giving back one great final gift. However, as I begin my medical school education, I have gained an even better perspective on the selfless gift of our donor. Like those others who in death have given someone else a second chance at life through their vital organs, my donor is also giving the gift of life. He is giving life to my education and proficiency as a clinician. And most importantly, he is giving life to all of my future patients. It is through my donor that years from now I will draw on what I have learned during my time in gross anatomy.

This is the second time that I have had the opportunity to dissect a cadaver. I went into this experience with a pretty good idea of what to expect when we opened those stainless steel containers. I thought, like last year, I would focus on our task for the day and not the totality of the person on whom we were working. But during one of the moments in which I had handed off the scalpel to one of my group members, I began to look at the hands of our donor. His hands had a familiarity to them that took me beyond anatomy lab and led me to a trail of thoughts about who once held those hands lovingly, what children might have examined those big hands with curiosity, or who looked to those hands for support or strength. I realized that the word “cadaver”, although the correct term, did not do this man justice. He was not just “a cadaver”, but someone whom we would get to know very well in the coming months.

After our first week with our donor, I noticed that each lab session we approached him with increasing familiarity. The trepidation that we had as we began an external examination of the back of this stranger was soon turned into a respectful awe. Finding out his cause of death, bladder cancer, also added an element of self-disclosure – it was a piece of our donor’s story. Three days a week (at least) our wide-eyed group leans in close like sponges to soak in everything we can. Our donor allows us to delve into what was his most intimate and personal possession. In taking the time with our donor seriously, my group members and I are setting the stage for our medical education with some of the most unchanging fundamentals in a field that is ever evolving.

I have always been taught “to whom much is given, much is expected”. We now have a great responsibility, and I will spend the entirety of my career trying to repay his gift – by using the knowledge I have learned to improve the lives of my patients. I also feel like this is our donor’s opportunity to take back what the invasive and unyielding cancer tried to take from him. In the end it was him, and not the cancer, that determined the fate of his body. And in turn, our donor is training those who can help continue the fight to eradicate it. His decision to give an anatomical gift has reframed what I once defined to be a selfless act. He is a quintessential example of altruism and may he rest in peace.

White Coat Ceremony Weekend

This past weekend was awesome. My wonderful family all drove up to support me and this big life step and it was a great time. I get tearful thinking about it, because this is such a HUGE accomplishment that I know I couldn't have gotten to without God and the love and support of my family. I am so so so so blessed.

After the Dean of the medical school said a few words and introductions, the keynote speaker, a pediatrician, asked us "who will you be?". She said that people have been asking us "what will you be?" for years and we have said "doctor", but now it is time to take that further. What kind of person will we be? What kind of doctor will we be? Integrity, honesty, and respect were some of the themes that came up, and she closed with a quote from her favorite doctor - Dr. Seuss :-)

"Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go...

Kid, you’ll move mountains!
So…be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!"

-Oh! The Places You'll Go

We were then "coated" (my pic even made the Indy paper!) and recited the physicians oath - promising to put others before ourselves and to use our knowledge for the improvement of humanity. After that I was inspired and ready to get down to business.

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On Sunday, we said our goodbyes as our loved ones returned to their respective homes. Pumpkin also went on a mini-vacay with Hubby's mom. I was so emotional when he left. He kept smiling and waving at us from his car seat saying, "byeee! byeee!" as they pulled off. I was an emotional mess...you would have thought he had never went somewhere without me before...LOL

To end the night, the Hubs and I went to our new favorite Indy spot and watched the sunset :-)

White Coat Ceremony - More The Indianapolis Star Galleries

View this gallery at The Indianapolis Star: White Coat Ceremony

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Today was more orientation and our first anatomy lecture and lab. It was good :-D The rest of the week we are learning basic clinical skills along with anatomy lectures and lab, and next week we will jump into the regularly scheduled program...which means these posts will become a little more infrequent...LOL

First Day as an M1

So yesterday was orientation part 1!! It was really nice and VERY informative. After checking in there was a bunch of random logistical stuff we had to get done - like buying our first course packets (sidenote:...my gross anatomy course packet is huge and is for the FIRST EXAM ONLY...well Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore...), and then we received many warm welcomes and a brief introduction to some classes, more financial aid info, and some self-inventory activities.

Even though I have spent the last year in the medical science building and there were many familiar faces, I approached everything like new. This time I have a locker and a mailbox by the M1s :-D I have classes in a new auditorium , and anatomy lab is HUGE....six students to a cadaver and there are like 170 students in the lab...whew...

At lunch there was an activities fair (a waaay smaller version of Diag Day at Michigan, but it was still great) and you could sign up for different interest groups related to specialties you might be interested in, diversity orgs, women's orgs, Christian orgs, outreach clinics, etc. I feel like I got on too many listservs, but everything sounded great LOL...

The speakers/faculty yesterday definitely put things back into perspective for me. Despite the nervousness for the year, I mustn't (spell check said that's right :-P) forget that I am doing this to make a difference in this world, to help to save lives, and to touch families...I am so excited that I am getting closer and closer to realizing my dream :tear:

Today is more orientation this morning, family orientation for the hubs, and later, the much anticipated white coat ceremony!! stay tuned!

Last Day of Break

Yesterday my family mourned the loss of our beloved pet Russian tortoise - Scottie. We had him for eleven years and recently he was feeling under the weather. The vet did all that she could, but we still lost him :-( This post is dedicated to Scottie R.

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In the last couple of days I pretty much accomplished everything on my things to do/buy list and now we are ready to go! Hubby has been quite the little worker bee - staining our kitchen table, cleaning the carpet, doing everything I ask him to ;-)

Pumpkin got his first backpack and matching lunch box for school and let me tell you, it is cayyyute! He still doesn't like the idea of having something on his back, but he does like carrying both bags in each hand. I didn't get a good picture this morning, so stay tuned...

Today I finally made it to a hairdresser in Indy and it was a success. She specializes in non-permed and natural hair so it was a great match for me. I still miss my hairdresser/friend in Michigan, but she is a good secondary since I probably won't be able to make it back to Detroit as often this year...After I got my hair done, I did my makeup and I went to get my new school ID picture taken so that I would look nice and fresh this time around in the hair department - somehow it didn't translate well into my photo for school last year...Well, yea, I'm convinced that any ID picture one takes is more often than not going to look like there was no planning whatsoever... Either way, I'm excited :-D

Hopefully I won't sweat my hair out before the ceremony on Saturday afternoon, because it is an "excessive heat" advisor until tomorrow at 8PM....WOMP.

And now I am off to work...double WOMP

Orientation tomorrow!!! eeeek! I'm so blessed to be finally going to med school!!!

Closet Love

Today, Pumpkin and I ran some errands. First, we got my pants hemmed - BCBG pants run so long, and I have been needing to get this done for a loooong time. We also, did a mini mall run - continued from my solo one yesterday, and picked up a few shirts to refresh our school wardrobes...pumpkin also managed to get a new pair of sunglasses. I also cleaned out my closet for the second time this summer and got rid of the things I haven't worn in a year (Oprah tip), but didn't get rid of when I should have earlier in the summer. I have a week's worth of jeans, my dresses are in good shape, and summer shoes are fine... I think I'm going to get rid of my jogging outfits but I'm not sure...they are looking kind of dated, but they are so comfy - which is great for cool library days...somehow I ended up with 3 red ones, two of which are velour...eh LOL

At some point this week I need to pick up:

1. a real back pack - my shoulders were so mad last year when I tried to be cute with over-sized purse-like bags...

2. new glasses - haven't had any new frames since sophomore year of college...enough said lol

3. boat shoes - I have wanted a pair of these for the longest

4. fresh pack of white men's v-neck undershirts

5. gym shoes? - undecided...haven't had that new school pair of air force one's in years...LOL

Financial aid check, where, oh where are you???

Sunday

So this weekend went nothing at all how I thought it would, but that's okay because I still have plenty to be thankful for...

Church was on point today (per usual). Our new church home has really been a blessing since I started going back in October (we just joined in June)...The children's church has been on break during all of July, but now Pumpkin can go run around, play, and be as loud as he wants to, and we can stay in the sanctuary again :-)

He talked about the power of a positive confession. Growing up and over the years I have always been taught that our words have power, but he brought a lot of great new insight to it today. He said that faith is not a denial of your situation, but instead an attitude we choose to have DESPITE our situation because we know what is fact - God's word. Example: You may not have any money right now, BUT God's word says he will supply ALL needs exceedingly above all we could ask or think. He talked about how Jesus brought a woman's son back to life while the funeral processional was going on and they were about to bury him. Just like that woman, God can still work a miracle in our lives despite the fact that we have given up and are just about to "bury" our problem.

He also told this story: There was a man, and all he owned was a donkey. Well one day he was walking with his donkey behind him and he looked back and the donkey was gone, but there was a big hole. He looks down in the hole and sure enough, the donkey is in the hole unable to get out. The man is discouraged because he has nothing left besides the donkey so he goes away sad. The next day he decides to bury the donkey because he can't just watch it die. So he starts digging and throwing dirt on the donkey. After a while, he notices that he can see the donkey's ears above the hole. So he looks in the hole and realizes that every time he throws dirt on the donkey, he shakes it off, pats it down, and goes to a new level...so when the devil thinks he is getting ready to bury you, God says just shake it off, pat it down, and He will take you to a new level.

So on point...I can apply this principle to so many things in my life right now, and I am so excited to see God move :-D

Ready for the Weekend!!

I guess this post is pretty self explanatory...looks like the Indiana state fair arrived today :-D If it isn't too dangerously hot, I am hoping our little family can check it out...Not too much to blog about today, but hopefully I will have some "Indianapolis Adventure" posts by tomorrow...

Time for a Check-up!

Today Pumpkin had his 18month check up. While we waited for his pediatrician (whom we LOVE) We(I mostly) had a little fun with the instruments...LOL Thanking God for a clean bill of health! The doctor said that not only is he up to date on all of his milestones, he has a lot of two year old milestones under his belt - my little genius baby. It might have something to do with the fact that he is as tall as and weighs as much as a two year old.... We are also thankful for no shots today :-D We won't see the pediatrician again until he's two! Pumpkin gave her a big hug on the way out...

18 month stats:

Height - 34 1/2 inches (97th percentile)

Weight - 33lbs 1oz (>97th percentile)

Another Day...

So I decided to keep Pumpkin in daycare part-time for the next two weeks because I don't want him to get out of the habit of going for when I am back in school. I've been trying to treat the days that he goes like a practice run of getting out of the house in time for school...I have to be in class by 8AM, buuuut lately I've been rolling out of bed at 8:30...WOMP. Despite the dragging, one of us was a still little ray of sunshine while eating his toast and jelly :-D Next week we'll have it together...

In other news, I'm super duper (yes, I said it) excited about my White Coat ceremony next weekend!!! It's going to be at the Murat Theatre downtown and lots of family will be coming to watch. This will definitely be the highlight of my first year of medical school - besides when I take my last final of the year ;-) Oh, and I have to get my first diagnostic set this year too!!! (the joys of being a nerd) <- it's the thing the doctor uses to look in your ears, eyes, mouth, etc... I'm so official :-)

Annnnd....This weekend one of my bffs will be coming to Indy for a family reunion which means we finally get to have a visitor!! It is like pulling teeth trying to get people down to Indianapolis. When everyone thought we would be moving to Atlanta they were way more enthusiastic - go figure :-P But anyway, I need to give her the best of the city...I'm thinking some sushi (our fav), downtown nightlife, and maybe a little Broad Ripple... It's been a while since I've been out, so this should be a nice change of pace for me too...

A Little Home Improvement

Two weeks left...no huge plans, just to spend time with my N-squared and make a few more summer memories. Plus the occasional waitressing shift...very occasional. I think that everything is pretty much settled in our new apartment although I would love to make a trip to The Container Store or Ikea just to see if there is anything we could add in the organizational department...

I've also been bustling around the place today re-arranging furniture, pictures, and double checking our childproofing since the little one seems to be entering a new stage of "by any means necessary" exploration. I've realized that pictures really do make a world of difference. It definitely started feeling the most "homey" it has ever been in here when familiar faces were hung on the wall...so now I feel like I'm in "hang pictures" overload...can you overdo it? I guess we'll find out...LOL

I would also like to paint Pumpkin's room at some time (but I doubt that will happen this summer), look for a big painting for the wall opposite the front door entryway, stain our dining room table, and have some shelves put in in the living room...my Hubs is so handy, so the possibilities are endless LOL... He thinks we might as well stay here for all four years of school, so we gotta get to decorating!

:Singing: Happy Birthday to Meeee!

Yesterday I turned 23 years old, and I celebrated with a wonderful weekend. Saturday night began my celebration with dinner with my boys and a walk along the canal (where the hubs and I tied the knot). Sunday morning I awoke to the aroma of some DELICIOUS cupcakes which I decided to have for breakfast with my coffee...LOL. Hubs played the role of personal chef and cooked my requested menu for the day...YUM! Later, my mom and two of my three brothers also came down for the night. We finished the celebration off at Rick's Cafe on the Eagle Creek Reservoir and ate dinner while we watched the sunset. My day was filled with so much love and I couldn't have asked for anything better :-)

Today pumpkin had a blast with his uncles in the morning and running around town with us. He is counting to 10, singing his ABCs, and counting backwards from 3 (LOL)... I am so proud of my little baby genius. After he took his bath and got ready for bed I brought in a bottle and he lights up and says "a ba!"...It was soooo cute! Definitely a parent moment...

Oh, and he is currently in the big boy bed...FTW